If life is a game . . . these are the rules!

Health & Wellness Fruit Basket

If life is a game . . . these are the rules!
Cherie Carter-Scott

Rule One – You will receive a body. Whether you love it or hate it, it’s yours for life, so accept it. What counts is what’s inside.

Rule Two – You will be presented with lessons. Life is a constant learning experience, which every day provides opportunities for you to learn more. These lessons specific to you, and learning them ‘is the key to discovering and fulfilling the meaning and relevance of your own life’.

Rule Three – There are no mistakes, only lessons. Your development towards wisdom is a process of experimentation, trial and error, so it’s inevitable things will not always go to plan or turn out how you’d want. Compassion is the remedy for harsh judgement – of ourselves and others. Forgiveness is not only divine – it’s also ‘the act of erasing an emotional debt’. Behaving ethically, with integrity, and with humour – especially the ability to laugh at yourself and your own mishaps – are central to the perspective that ‘mistakes’ are simply lessons we must learn.

Rule Four – The lesson is repeated until learned. Lessons repeat until learned. What manifest as problems and challenges, irritations and frustrations are more lessons – they will repeat until you see them as such and learn from them. Your own awareness and your ability to change are requisites of executing this rule. Also fundamental is the acceptance that you are not a victim of fate or circumstance – ‘causality’ must be acknowledged; that is to say: things happen to you because of how you are and what you do. To blame anyone or anything else for your misfortunes is an escape and a denial; you yourself are responsible for you, and what happens to you. Patience is required – change doesn’t happen overnight, so give change time to happen.


Rule Five – Learning does not end. While you are alive there are always lessons to be learned. Surrender to the ‘rhythm of life’, don’t struggle against it. Commit to the process of constant learning and change – be humble enough to always acknowledge your own weaknesses, and be flexible enough to adapt from what you may be accustomed to, because rigidity will deny you the freedom of new possibilities.

Rule Six – “There” is no better than “here”. The other side of the hill may be greener than your own, but being there is not the key to endless happiness. Be grateful for and enjoy what you have, and where you are on your journey. Appreciate the abundance of what’s good in your life, rather than measure and amass things that do not actually lead to happiness. Living in the present helps you attain peace.

Rule Seven – Others are only mirrors of you. You love or hate something about another person according to what love or hate about yourself. Be tolerant; accept others as they are, and strive for clarity of self-awareness; strive to truly understand and have an objective perception of your own self, your thoughts and feelings. Negative experiences are opportunities to heal the wounds that you carry. Support others, and by doing so you support yourself. Where you are unable to support others it is a sign that you are not adequately attending to your own needs.

Rule Eight – What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. Take responsibility for yourself. Learn to let go when you cannot change things. Don’t get angry about things – bitter memories clutter your mind. Courage resides in all of us – use it when you need to do what’s right for you. We all possess a strong natural power and adventurous spirit, which you should draw on to embrace what lies ahead.

Rule Nine – Your answers lie inside of you. Trust your instincts and your innermost feelings, whether you hear them as a little voice or a flash of inspiration. Listen to feelings as well as sounds. Look, listen, and trust. Draw on your natural inspiration.

Rule Ten – You will forget all this at birth. We are all born with all of these capabilities – our early experiences lead us into a physical world, away from our spiritual selves, so that we become doubtful, cynical and lacking belief and confidence.

Tapestry Peacock

The ten rules are not commandments, they are universal truths that apply to us all. When you lose your way, call upon them.

Have faith in the strength of your spirit.

Aspire to be wise – wisdom the ultimate path of your life, and it knows no limits other than those you impose on yourself.

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Seven things you need to remind yourself of when you wake up . . .

African Lion

We may not always love everything about our lives, but deep down we do love and appreciate the magic of life itself. Some part of us believes that everything and anything is possible.

Sadly, though, we don’t always believe these possibilities are within our reach. But the reality is they are – we all live lives of endless possibility. The problem is we choose to believe otherwise. We choose to believe we are incapable of living our lives the way we want to live them, at our full potential. We choose to accept our reality as others have told us it has to be.

Wake up! We don’t have to do this to ourselves – none of us do. We have a choice. We don’t have to be complacent. We don’t have to fall into line. Why not stir things up a bit and live by better rules?

It’s time to remind yourself of a few key truths – right now and every morning hereafter . . .

1. Today can be a good day, but only if you make it so
– Why do we often feel so powerless? Because we convince ourselves that we are. We wait for things to be given to us – entitlements. In life, there are no true entitlements, and the reality is that if you want something then you need to make it happen for yourself. You need to work for it. Whether or not today is a good day doesn’t depend on the weather. It doesn’t depend on your “mood” (that’s also in your control). It doesn’t depend on anyone else. If you want to have a pleasant and wonderful day then choose to have one. It’s all about your perception and what you allow yourself to believe.

2. Greatness is a lifestyle, not a result
– We all want to “achieve” greatness…. but we need to remember that greatness in not a specific achievement. Greatness is not crossing over the finishing line. It’s the ability to fight the good fight day in and day out. Greatness is strength – the strength to keep pushing and to keep living your life the way you want to live it. Greatness isn’t an end result. It’s a state of being. You don’t win great. You are great every day.

3. Your life is yours to design
– There are plenty of things in life that are out of our control, but don’t let this fool you into believing that your life as a whole is out of your control. The reality is, the life you are living is almost entirely by your own design. You have made choices along the way that led you down the road you’re currently traveling. Saying that your life is out of your control is a copout – it’s what other people want you to believe so that they have an easier time getting you to do what they want you to do.

Bright flowers

4. The fact that you haven’t given up is success in itself
–It may give you little comfort to think about how you’re still waist deep in the struggle, but the truth is that you are one of the strong people with the guts to keep at it. Most people give up before they even begin… but not you. No, you wake up every day and get things done. You crawl inch by inch against the current because you refuse to give up. You refuse to accept failure. You refuse to listen to others when they tell you that you’re not good enough. You’re still in it.

5. Bullies and energy vampires are not worth worrying about
– The fact is that most people just aren’t that important in our lives. Nevertheless, we sometimes forget this, allowing the wrong people to take up too much space in our daily lives. We meet energy vampires and bullies regularly – especially when you live in a highly populated area or work in a large company. These individuals will try to get to you, will try to influence you and become a part of your life because they find their own life to be mundane. They already poisoned their own lives and now they are looking to poison yours. Don’t let them get to you.

Flowers on wooden table

6. Good things in life end too soon when they aren’t appreciated
– This isn’t to say that appreciating what you have when you have it comes naturally – our minds tend to consider the possibility that the grass on the other side is greener. But we need to mindfully remind ourselves that life isn’t about doing our best to constantly upgrade things. To live a happy, fulfilling life, we have to learn to appreciate what we have and love those that we have. If you fall in love then do your sincere best to nurture your love. Don’t wait for things to end before you start appreciating them.

7. Never expect a tomorrow, but be thankful when tomorrow comes
– Think about how many people die every minute of every day and you’ll begin to realize that waking up in the morning is a blessing. We don’t live in a world of perpetual peace, but one laden with bouts of chaos. On top of this, accidents do happen and people get severely injured and die because of them. Getting another day to breathe, to experience life, and to do something meaningful is the greatest gift one can receive. Make today count!

From Marc and Angel Hack Life: http://www.marcandangel.com

How to find your great contribution: Reflect on the journey

Brook_Water over rocks

I have just three things to teach:
• Simplicity
• Patience
• Compassion
These three are your greatest treasures.
– Lao Tzu


Did you know there are 5 sources of competence? They are:
1. Natural talent and aptitude
2. Developed skill
3. Wisdom gleaned through relationships
4. Knowledge from school and books
5. Insight gained from success and failure

The source of your great contribution:
The first step is to reflect on your frailty or lack, not on your strength(s).

How are you solving your need for meaning or fulfilment?
Great competency emerges out of great struggle. The issue you’re solving is the answer someone else needs. Find your great contribution by working through personal frailty.

Your great contribution is answering a personal struggle. “What’s important to you about feeling like you’re worth something?”


Reflect on the answers you need. Give others the solutions you find.

Your journey has the answer: Pretending you’re something you’re not, blocks your great contribution.

Life_Hand releasing butterfly

Reflect on the journey:
1. What issues are you solving?
2. How is your story connected to your passion?
3. What adversities have you overcome?
4. How does your journey enhance your worth?

What blocks your great contribution?

How we see ourselves comes from our attitude

Kintsukuroi_Ring the bells


Have you heard about the Japanese art form called Kintsukuroi which means to “repair with gold”. When a ceramic pot or bowl breaks or cracks, it is put together again using gold or silver to create something stronger and more beautiful than it was before.

It doesn’t hide or cover up the damage, it embraces the crack and acknowledges the history of the object while celebrating its imperfections and flaws. It is the art of understanding that the object is stronger and more beautiful because it has been broken. Instead of trying to hide the damage, Kintsukuroi illuminates it. This is done because mending is an art, because you understand there is beauty in the broken places because behind every scar is a story. We are made of stories.

Many of us at some point find ourselves traumatised or victimized, broken at some point. We got into the wrong car, or trusted the wrong person. We lost someone important, we were born into the wrong family. However it happened, we tasted brokenness at some point, and what you learn there you cannot unlearn. That knowledge becomes part of you. It’s a question of how you carry it – or allow it to carry you.

Trauma is sometimes described as the stuff you leave out of a story. You can’t speak it. You can’t even look at it. You exile it into the darkest edges of your life – but that’s exactly where it grows a story all of its own, a secret and festering history that pulls you off course and divides you inside yourself.


It’s only when you find the strength – and a safe inner space – to process those experiences, and weave them into your daylight life narrative, that you gain any real power over them. You put stories to the scars. What kind of stories you tell is up to you. You can’t change the past, and you can’t change the facts – but story is the stuff you put around the facts in order to relate them and charge them with meaning.

How we see things comes from attitude. I can choose to feel sad that my body is covered in scars, that it is broken and damaged, or I can think of myself like Kintsukoroi – I have been repaired with something precious and I’m more beautiful for it.

Kintsukuroi artisans mend the cracks with gold: gold suggests luminosity, the energy of consciousness itself. When we mend, we make meaning from the raw materials of our lives and create ourselves in lines of illumination that show where the stories are.

We take our wounds and turn them into light. That is the healing . . . and the art.

Just remember – no matter what anyone tells you . . . YOU ARE ENOUGH!

Hope is a choice

How you look bears no relevance to the type of person you are
• All good things that happen in life do not come from how you look, but from how you are
• Kindness, loyalty, caring, passion, silliness, excitement, hard work and fun are the things people love about you – they don’t care what size dress you wear
• The most wonderful power is that of self-love and when you are loving and accepting of your body, it feels pretty good
• When you feel confident and happy, it stops other people being able to hurt you
• Even though the whole world has an opinion about your body, the only opinion that matters is your own opinion, so stop worrying about what other people think of you and work on feeling the best you can about yourself.
• In years to come you will probably be a few sizes bigger than you were when you were a teenager but you will be happier, more confident and you will watch the surprise on your face when you realise this is completely true.
• Enjoy your body a lot more and stop wasting so much time worrying about how you look
• Celebrate your healthy body, enjoy that you are well and strong because you don’t know what the future holds in terms of your health
• Our bodies are a miracle and the only one we have, so we need to look after it, be respectful of it, love it.
• Your body belongs to YOU, not anyone else. You’re not as fat as you think you are and it doesn’t matter even if you ARE fat.
• Throughout our lives we worry that our peers are judging us when actually we are so busy thinking about ourselves that we rarely care what anyone else looks like. In reality people don’t care! They are thinking about their own life and their own issues.
• Wear whatever you want, whether it is “in fashion”, “suits you”, “is appropriate” or not, because in years to come you will look back on that favourite outfit with fond memories.
• Those who are very tall . . . STOP SLOUCHING!! Your height is awesome and galumphing giraffes are just as beautiful as petite sparrows.
• Be more confident in your body and be less self-conscious and stop comparing yourself to those photo-shopped celebs in magazines because they are not real.
• Stop buying stupid women’s magazines

Care less about others’ opinions, love yourself more and celebrate your uniqueness!

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