There is an Indian belief that everyone is a house of four rooms – a physical, a mental, an emotional and a spiritual.
Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room every day, even if only to keep it aired, we are not complete.
It has been almost one year now that I have spent most of my time in my emotional room. I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster for eleven months now and some days it is more difficult to suppress the emotions wanting to come to the surface. Why the need to suppress these emotions, I hear you asking?
• Cannot cry at home because I don’t want mom to feel like she is causing me stress or feel that she is a burden to me (because she is not).
• Cannot cry at work because I don’t want to have to explain to everyone why I need to cry. Not everyone will understand which will make me want to cry even more.
• I usually shed a tear or two while driving home or on my way to work or on my way to the grocery store. This, however, has to be suppressed as quickly as possible because it usually happens in the last five minutes before I reach my destination and I don’t want to walk in with red swollen eyes.
• Cannot cry when I’m alone in bed at night because mom could call me at any time and . . . (see first bullet point)
• Cannot ask someone to stay with mom while I go off somewhere by myself to cry – just seems daft to do this and I will worry more about what’s going on at home in my absence i.e. if mom’s condition should deteriorate in my absence.
I need to cry, I need to have one good old crying session – just me and my box of tissues. Having some chocolate or ice cream in the same room is not a bad idea. They are my comfort foods. I love teddies too, so maybe a teddy to hug is not a bad idea either.
What else would I need to have in my room? My PJ’s and slippers. On the day that I have this crying session, I would not want to get dressed. I would want to walk around in my PJ’s and slippers all day. Needlesss to say I will not want any visitors coming around on this day. I would want the freedom to not need to open the door nor answer the telephone.
What will happen after I have had this crying session? Well, it will free me of all this pent up emotions I have been suppressing and will enable me to move on with my life. It will enable me to take better care of my physical, mental and spiritual rooms which have been sadly neglected these last few months.
I have not completely abandoned my physical room, I have been in and out of that room every week, but I have not given it as much attention as it deserves. My mental room is very closely linked to my emotional room so once I have my emotional room sorted out, my mental room will automatically sort itself out.
My spiritual room? Well, I’m afraid to say that this one has been sorely neglected for a while now (for various reasons, the current reason not being the major cause).
How about you? Which room of your house are you spending most of your time in?
Which room would you prefer to spend more time in?
When will you be moving to the next room?